I have been waking up at good awful hours for over a month.  At 530 am this morning and it’s still pitch dark outside.  I try to go back to sleep but just can’t.  Other things are involved, but at some deep level I have been anxious about Joan, I think.  Also I was talking to the guy a couple of doors down.  He is in his seventies and wakes up a 300 in the morning and sometimes can’t get back to sleep.  I have heard a person’s sleep patterns change with age.  Maybe I will just have to get used to this.



Right before going to bed, I read the following from Brother Dave:

We just got home. I guess we left j about 8:45 and her breathing really sounded bad. They kept cranking up the morphine but she never slept. I’m not sure if our being there wasn’t keeping her up some how? I mean just being there.Hard to explain I guess. Well, a new nurse came on and we got them to do the suction thing a couple of times. I did sign all the hospice papers and so on. I’m going to LVDN and then hospital in morning AT….after traffic.

“Hard to explain I guess.”  Maybe dying for some one in Joan’s particular condition requires letting go somehow deep down.  The unconscious is a beast.

David and Teresa sat with Joan nearly the whole day, this in spite of the fact that Teresa had been concerned about our having to wear masks when with Joan.  She wrote a day or so ago:

I was concerned about the fact you had to be masked when visiting Joan. I called the nurse to ask what Joan had. She has MRSA (methicillin resistant staph aureus). I was worried because Stephen and David took Jacob last Wednesday without the masks. Joan got this at Palomar Hospital, there’s no doubt. I did find the following info. 

Is it safe for healthy people to be in contact with a person infected with MRSA? Can children contract MRSA from being around an infected person?

Healthy people, including children are at very low risk of contracting MRSA. Casual contact such as hugging is okay, however, hands should be washed before leaving the patient’s hospital room or home. Persons should use gloves, however, before handling any body fluids of infected persons, and remove the gloves and wash the hands before leaving the infected person’s room or home. Before an infected person leaves the hospital ask the nurse or doctor what precautions they recommend be taken at home. In general, follow good hygiene practices, as previously described.

I hate Hospitals.

Who knows what this day will bring?

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